The False Condemnation of Doubt

John had hit rock bottom. He was in a dark prison cell, awaiting his execution and he was questioning everything he had known. The prophet that had declared the way for Jesus had doubt. And not just a sliver of doubt, there was enough to talk to Jesus himself about his doubt. Was this really the Son of God? Had he wasted his entire life preparing the way for someone who wasn't even God? A dark prison can do that to you, cause you to question the very ground you stand on.

He sent word to Jesus. "Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?" As he sat in his prison cell, probably wondering if Jesus would disown him for being so blasphemous as to ask him if he were truly the Savior, Jesus received the question. 

No anger burst forth, no words of horror, as he realized his own prophet doubted the validity of everything he said.

Jesus is gentle in everything he does and everything he says. He turns from John's disciples and does the spectacular. He restored blind men's sight, he healed people of their sicknesses and diseases and cast out demons. He did nothing new. Only what he always did: Love.

He turned back to John's disciples and said to them, "Go and tell John what you have seen and heard: the blind receive their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, and the deaf hear, the dead are raised up, the poor have good news preached to them. And blessed is the one who is not offended by me."

How gentle he was in his words, He told John nothing new, only the truth. He did not condemn John for wondering again, if this truly was the Son of God. He only confirmed John, and encouraged him.
After the disciples left, Jesus turned to the people and told them, "I tell you, among those born of women none is greater than John. Yet the one who is least in the kingdom of God is greater then He."

He did not turn and say, "John, the doubter, he means little in the Kingdom of God because he doubted." No, he built John up despite his doubt. Jesus saw John's humanity, his fear and his loneliness. Jesus did not condemn John, he only restored to him his faith.

I take comfort in this story. More often than not, I look to Jesus and I saw things like, "I know I saw you do great things in the past, I know you have changed my life in amazing ways, I know you are a God of miracles, but...
are you going to come through for me this time?"

I have been in John's shoes, I send messages to Jesus not directly telling him I'm doubting him, but boy, do I doubt him. I doubt He will heal, again. I doubt, He will love, more. I doubt, I doubt...

And it feels so condemning. I put myself in my own prison cell when I doubt, Jesus I deserve this dark cell, but can you answer me just one more thing, Are you truly who you say you are?

He does not abandon me, He does not forsake my heart, He only does what He always does, He continues to love, he continues to heal. He steps into my self-built dungeon of doubt and tragedy, lifts up my head and says, "I still love you in your doubts." He takes my hand and sets my captive heart free to believe again. He liberates me to trust him again.

Doubt isn't always bad because Jesus shows me his heart. He reveals to me that He is still good, and his character is still true. In my faithlessness, he remains faithful. His promises are always true.

"If we have died with him, we will also live with him;

if we endure, we will also reign with him;

if we deny him, he also will deny us;

if we are faithless, he remains faithful-

for he cannot deny himself."

2 Timothy 2:11-13