Well, it is the start of week #2 at YWAM Louisville. I love it. I'm being challenged so much in my faith, not only with the speakers but in my personal Bible study. I live in a huge house full of 34 girls! Which is super fun, it's a party all the time (:
I want to give you a look into my daily schedule.
I wake up at (preferably 6:30) but it's been 7 lately. Eat some breakfast, which at times has turned into cheez-its or mac and cheese. At 7:30 we have quiet time for an hour. I've done various things with this time, take prayer walks, studied my Bible or just rested in God's presence.
At the end of this the vans pick us up to take us to the church where we have classes. Most mornings we have classes. Wednesdays though, we have an hour worship before classes which is awesome. Then we have lunch and more afternoon classes. Some days we also have intercessory prayer for the nations, praying for nations we could be visiting or problems facing the world today. Really whatever God lays on our hearts. 2 days out of the week we have small group, which I'm excited to get more involved in. Evenings have been free for homework, hanging out, or shopping for snacks :P I can't wait to learn more of what God will teach me. On Thursday I will be starting local ministry. We haven't been told exactly what that is yet, but I am so excited!!
I think one of the most important aspects I've loved is the relationships I've been forming. God knows how much my heart needs friendships and relationships, he has completely blessed me with the friends he's given. I can already feel life long friends forming. Friendships built on conversations about God are probably the best ones.
So that is a little excerpt into a day in YWAM. Any questions? Comment or email me! I'd love to tell you more personally about my experiences.
Monday, September 30, 2013
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Pride, Filthy Rags and Surrender
How often am I prideful? How often does my heart covet after things I don't have? How often have I stolen Christ's crown, his glory, for my own. I hold his crown and take the things that define me.The things I place on the alter of self. "Look, God, look at my gifts I bring you." He looks me in the eyes and says "filthy rags."
"But God, don't you see what I've done for you, how I changed their life?"
"Filthy Rags."
I steal his glory and offer it to Him like I have something good to bring. Something that will benefit our relationship. He says, "Filthy Rags."
Everything I try to bring is a filthy rag. Every heart I think I change, I steal his glory. Who am I to take it?
As I'm laying on the cross, hands ready to be driven with nails. Jesus comes and lifts me up, lays himself down and says, "Child, watch."
I watch as my sins nail him to the cross. I watch as my sin, the sin of stealing Christ's own glory, I watch as He dies in my place. I'm in a place of endless forgiveness, as I watch the things I did carelessly, the friends I hurt recklessly, all the sins I've done lain upon my Savior and He says "I forgive you. I want none of your filthy rags, they are nothing to me. I want none of the things you think you have to offer. I want an empty you, so I can fill you up. You will be righteous only by my blood. Let me soften your heart."
This leads to the surrender.
God will bring up hurts in your life you thought you had healed from. It will be hard. Today, through strange circumstances, God brought up pain I had suppressed. He let me grieve. I'm not sure I cried harder than I did today. All my unanswered questions came out and I asked 'Why?'
This is going to be a season of surrender. It's going to be a season of confronting the hard things, the convicting things. But it will be worth it. God will show me things like pride, I never thought I'd need to confront. He will walk me through grief. He will transform me.
"But God, don't you see what I've done for you, how I changed their life?"
"Filthy Rags."
I steal his glory and offer it to Him like I have something good to bring. Something that will benefit our relationship. He says, "Filthy Rags."
Everything I try to bring is a filthy rag. Every heart I think I change, I steal his glory. Who am I to take it?
As I'm laying on the cross, hands ready to be driven with nails. Jesus comes and lifts me up, lays himself down and says, "Child, watch."
I watch as my sins nail him to the cross. I watch as my sin, the sin of stealing Christ's own glory, I watch as He dies in my place. I'm in a place of endless forgiveness, as I watch the things I did carelessly, the friends I hurt recklessly, all the sins I've done lain upon my Savior and He says "I forgive you. I want none of your filthy rags, they are nothing to me. I want none of the things you think you have to offer. I want an empty you, so I can fill you up. You will be righteous only by my blood. Let me soften your heart."
This leads to the surrender.
God will bring up hurts in your life you thought you had healed from. It will be hard. Today, through strange circumstances, God brought up pain I had suppressed. He let me grieve. I'm not sure I cried harder than I did today. All my unanswered questions came out and I asked 'Why?'
This is going to be a season of surrender. It's going to be a season of confronting the hard things, the convicting things. But it will be worth it. God will show me things like pride, I never thought I'd need to confront. He will walk me through grief. He will transform me.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Time is a Thief, Time is a Giver
So many farewells, So many faces I must say goodbye to. So many friends I must walk away from, knowing how much distance will strain the proximity of our hearts. Time is a thief, trespassing into my days, stealing them away, in front of my eyes, and there is nothing I can do. So many things to do, in so little days, so little hours. Time dances moments in front of you, and you hold on so tight. But soon, the moment dissipates and the memory becomes hazy. The companion you were dancing with has gone. The friend you were hugging is only an impression on your mind. Time is a thief, but he is also a giver. He leaves us these gaps to fill, hearts to love, places to go, and beauty to see.
He takes so much, and it could leave us tremendously bitter, it could leave us with open wounds that are endlessly bleeding. But if we don't look and see, we will miss how time can leave us feeling miraculously alive, with scars etched in love and joy beating in our hearts that have felt the butterflies of fear and that have been pursued by unconditional Love Himself. Time allows us to say, "My cup has overflown."
Time teaches us to be thankful for what we have. He shows us just how easily it can be taken away. Just how shallow our breaths really are. That we are shadows, fading flowers, here for a moment, a blink, a breath.
Time grants us the moments that take our breath away. The moments we feel immortal. The moments in which we struggle to breathe from the amount of love and joy weighing on our hearts. The pain and the sorrow that are remarkably insignificant to the infinitely amazing emotions we feel, we breathe, we see.
Time grounds us to the important things. The things that in the end will be the only things left. It provides a catharsis for the trivial pursuits and the meaningless banter leaving us with the important. God, faith, family and friends.
Time gives the future. A place to dream of, A place to linger a little longer in your dreams. Time gives the present. A place to be intentional. Time gives the past to remind you of where you've been and what it took to get you here.
Time is many things, thief being the only downfall to his character. He gives an infinite amount of moments and as an old Cherokee man told me once, the moments are all we have been given. Use these moments, these precious gifts from God Himself, to give, and only receive the blessings of an overflowing cup. To love, infinitely, so it blinds eyes to hate, and they will only see Love. To laugh, until your sides hurt and tears are streaming down your face. To cry, but never so much that you despair. Cry but never lose your Hope. Cry but feel the joy in your heart also.
Never hate time, Time is a gift of God. Time is God telling us how mortal we are. How broken we are. How sinful. Time is God's gift, he sacrificed His infinite Time to love a finite race infinitely. He is not confined by Time yet he placed himself in time for us who are so bound by it. Thank you to my infinite God who has loved my finite heart so infinitely.
He takes so much, and it could leave us tremendously bitter, it could leave us with open wounds that are endlessly bleeding. But if we don't look and see, we will miss how time can leave us feeling miraculously alive, with scars etched in love and joy beating in our hearts that have felt the butterflies of fear and that have been pursued by unconditional Love Himself. Time allows us to say, "My cup has overflown."
Time teaches us to be thankful for what we have. He shows us just how easily it can be taken away. Just how shallow our breaths really are. That we are shadows, fading flowers, here for a moment, a blink, a breath.
Time grants us the moments that take our breath away. The moments we feel immortal. The moments in which we struggle to breathe from the amount of love and joy weighing on our hearts. The pain and the sorrow that are remarkably insignificant to the infinitely amazing emotions we feel, we breathe, we see.
Time grounds us to the important things. The things that in the end will be the only things left. It provides a catharsis for the trivial pursuits and the meaningless banter leaving us with the important. God, faith, family and friends.
Time gives the future. A place to dream of, A place to linger a little longer in your dreams. Time gives the present. A place to be intentional. Time gives the past to remind you of where you've been and what it took to get you here.
Time is many things, thief being the only downfall to his character. He gives an infinite amount of moments and as an old Cherokee man told me once, the moments are all we have been given. Use these moments, these precious gifts from God Himself, to give, and only receive the blessings of an overflowing cup. To love, infinitely, so it blinds eyes to hate, and they will only see Love. To laugh, until your sides hurt and tears are streaming down your face. To cry, but never so much that you despair. Cry but never lose your Hope. Cry but feel the joy in your heart also.
Never hate time, Time is a gift of God. Time is God telling us how mortal we are. How broken we are. How sinful. Time is God's gift, he sacrificed His infinite Time to love a finite race infinitely. He is not confined by Time yet he placed himself in time for us who are so bound by it. Thank you to my infinite God who has loved my finite heart so infinitely.
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