Thursday, March 5, 2015

Four Hundred and Ninety Times

The question was imposed upon Jesus, "How often will my brother sin against me and I forgive him? As many as seven times?
I believe Jesus was slightly broken by this questions, thinking "Seriously? You still don't get it?"
But Jesus replies with an answer that baffles the minds of all listening.
He says "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven."
In the ears of the fellow Jews, in the culture they were living in, they knew Jesus was implying that it was not four hundred and ninety times in a lifetime, but in one twenty-four hour period.
He was in a sense saying, "Forgive the same sin on the same day every two minutes."
There is a person in my life who I feel as if I must forgive her of the same sin on the same day every thirty seconds. And let me tell you, it's hard.
I've been telling her, Yes, I forgive you. It's okay. It's fine.
But I thought about it. Am I really forgiving her? Or am I still holding all the things against her in my heart? I've put stipulations on her, I'll forgive you when you change. I'll forgive you when I see you choosing to walk away from the things you are doing. If you do this, then you will be worthy to receive my forgiveness.

What if Jesus did that to me? 

What if Jesus said, "I'll forgive you when I see your change. I won't believe your repentance until to stop these sins that you just seem to write off as unimportant."
No conditions, no stipulations He has looked at my sin and covered it with His blood. He has said to me "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in me."

I have read Romans 8 a million times and recently, I have decided to memorize it. And no matter how many times I have read it, I've missed something so vital. Repeating it again and again to myself, I've had a revelation.
He tells us that setting the mind on the things of the Spirit is to live by the Spirit and to set the mind on things of the flesh is to live by the flesh. Even though, I've grown up in the church, these words get lost amidst the other words that we associate with fluent church language.
Put to death the deeds of the flesh, we say. Live by the Spirit. And often, I think, that because the Holy Spirit dwells within me, I have already done this. I already live by the Spirit, so why worry?
Living by the Spirit is a choice.
When I choose the Spirit, I gain life abundantly over living within a spirit of fear.
I gain peace over worry. I am valued as a child of God, completely secure in my identity over desperately trying to do things to fit in.
I see the direction for my life instead of choosing some random path because of my lack of trust.
The list need not continue because the benefits of choosing to listen, hear and obey the Spirit are more valuable than choosing the momentary distractions of the flesh.

Love is greater than anything I have ever known. Love has pursued me and filled me up. Love is overflowing out of me because of what has been done for me. And I come to know that it is empowered supernaturally within me. Only with the Spirit can I be patient and not irritable and steadfast for those who need it. Only with Love Himself can I love and be loved.

Four Hundred and Ninety times. Live by the Spirit four hundred and ninety times. Choose forgiveness four hundred and ninety times. Love four hundred and ninety times every day.
Later in Romans 8 after Paul has given us his talk on living by the spirit and not the flesh, he says this, "If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you."

One day all his promises He has given us, One day everything we've given our lives for will come into fruition. One day the things we have been waiting for will be fulfilled. One day we will finally see redemption win. We won't just see tiny glimpses that remind us that God is still working, we won't just hear a still small voice, we will see redemption win. We will see Jesus riding on a white horse, His Name will be Faithful and True. His eyes are like a flame of fire and on his head are many diadems and he has a name written that no one knows but himself. He is clothed in a robe dipped in blood, and the name by which he is called is The Word of God. On his robe and on his thigh he has a name written, King of kings and Lord of lords. And He will say "Come, gather for the great supper of the lame." Come.
On that day all will be worth it. On that day we will see how we have been forgiven four hundred and ninety times infinity, and with his eyes of fire that should bring judgement and wrath He looks at us with only love. And says come. Your name is written in my Book of Life, Come and enter into rest my beloved Child.
On that day, the weariness that comes with striving after love and faithfulness will be gone because we will see how it wasn't worth comparing to this glory we now see. One day, this hard life will be a blip on the span of eternity and we will be in a new Heaven and a New Earth walking eternity with Jesus Christ Himself.

Four Hundred and Ninety times I will forgive in my heart. Every day, Every sin, Every minute.
Four Hundred and Ninety times I will choose to be empowered by the Holy Spirit to live a life Holy and Pleasing to Him.
Because He is worth it, I have decided that He is far more valuable than my comfort. Far more valuable than my insecurity and fear.
He is worth more.
Four Hundred and Ninety times every second I will choose Him.

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